My Heart Belongs to Texas

It’s been a very long time since I’ve really blogged. Sure, I’ve done a few posts the past year documenting past memories. But I haven’t written anything with purpose.

I can’t remember the last time I did an ‘update blog.’ The last time I wrote a blog about what God has done in my life. Or written a blog about what God has taught me. I also haven’t really done any art or read any books. I haven’t done anything artsy or creative.

This past year, I lost myself. The self I worked so hard to find. The self, that took me months to rummage through crap to find. The self that I cried, screamed and fought to set free. I lost her.

I know some might think: “Don’t be so dramatic.” No, I’m not being dramatic and I’m not over reacting. I’m not the person I was when I left Texas. I’m not the happy go lucky, energetic, God loving girl I was when I left. I’ve reverted back to ‘Stella and Star.’

I’m not completely like how I was. I don’t think I could fully be that person again. I changed so much in Texas. I matured in Texas. But I have re-picked up a lot of the characteristics of ‘Stella and Star.’

I woke up this morning with a burning desire to return to Texas. I woke up and the first thing in my mind was that I must go back. I have to go home.

I miss Texas. I miss my friends and the family I created. I miss being around a support system and people that I know love me. I miss feeling safe and protected.

I love Texas. It will always be my home.