Back Down. Don't You Back Down Baby Tonight!

One of my favorite bands at the moment is Philmont. I really love their music and their style. Their music brings me joy and encourages me a lot.

I’d been trying to get to one of their concerts since the beginning of the year, but one way or another, it just never worked out. I started working on a drawing of them. I wanted to give it to them if I ever did get to see them perform. After seven long months (and long breaks) I finally finished the drawing and finally found my way to one of their shows.

I’ll admit, I was obsessing over this drawing. I wanted to make sure I was drawing it to the best of my ability and that it looked just right before I gave it to them. I was so proud of the end product. But when it finally became the time to give it to them - I was nervous. What if they didn’t like it? What if they played it off as “sunshine and rainbows” but secretly cared less.

So here I find myself, in Bedford, TX in a church sanctuary a few feet away from their table and I can’t bring myself to go to them. I take a deep breath, close my eyes and move quickly. They’re all sitting in a corner, in a semi-circle, so I jump in the middle of the circle, hold my gift out and shout: “I have a present!” Ha ha, I have no idea what caused me to do this, but I did.

They all look at me, smile and jump to their feet. They grab the present and stare at it. The wrapping distracts them; they were impressed with my warping skills. After asking questions on what the envelope was covered in, they open it and pull off all the protective layers of foam and card board.

When the drawing is fully exposed in the open, there’s a pause for two seconds and then: “Hey! That’s the drawing from Facebook! You drew that?!” I was shocked, surprised and impressed that they had seen the picture I had posted. I was taken aback when they each started to state back details I had written on Facebook about the process of the drawing.

Britt, a girlfriend of one of the band members', said she saw the picture on my profile and looks at my art; she really likes my style. The band members also mentioned that they looked at my ‘step by step’ pictures of the drawing. I was touched. And I was honored when they placed the drawing on their merch table for everyone to see.

Over all, I was extremely blessed by their comments and their actions. I was extremely moved that they had taken the time to look at my art. They cared enough to look and read the random spurts of a spazzy young girl.

Thanks Philmont.

Bribe?

"You know Stella; I really like those rings of yours.” Ron says to me as we’re walking out of church. I know he means this sarcastically. “I like them so much that I want them. How much will you sell them to me for?”

I had gotten my lip pierced into a “snake bite” and everyone was giving me a hard time. I had wanted to pierce my lip for a while I’ve always loved the way snake bites looked. But, since living in East Texas I’ve learned what I think is “cool” isn’t always “proper” culturally. Consequently I’ve learned to tweak my appearance which has turned into this pretty cool mix-match eclectic style of color, shapes and layers. But, my snake bite was causing me to stick out more than usual.

With stares, glares and the occasional remarks of disgust I was getting use to people's disapproval. So when Ron genuinely and lovingly explained to me why he wanted me to take the rings out, it meant a lot to me. People made it clear that they didn't like the rings. But no one took the time to talk to me and ask me why.

Ron's words rang in my ear, "How much do you want for them?" The simple act touched my heart. Days went by and as I replayed the conversation in my head I was almost in tears. I didn’t understand why this meant so much to me. Why did it move me so? Why did this conversation affect my spirit?

Finally I asked myself why, and God answered. The reason Ron’s offer meant so much to me was because he was showing me true, healthy, godly, fatherly love.

The Lord showed me that that’s how much He loves me. And that He does the exact same thing. Whenever I give Him something, a part of me, and let Him in and willingly surrender my control. He comes and gives me something in return: freedom, healing and favor.

Once the Lord showed me this, I wept. The attention I’ve wanted and crave truly does come from the Lord. One silly, random and humorous comment from Ron has shaken my world completely.

So, I took the rings out and gave them to Ron – free of charge. I couldn’t bring myself to ask for anything in return when I had already received something more important. Love.

Reach.

Tan represents life.
Yellow represents a soul.
Red represents blood.
Black represents death.
Blue represents God.
Grey represents emptiness either physical or spiritual.

The half circle represents how freeing and open God is. The circles moves down representing how god reaches down to us. The circle in the middle represents how God needs to be the center of our lives. The tree to the left of the circle represents out growth in Christ.

The black squiggles represents how the enemy can engulf you, push you down and trap you in bondage. The fire represents our blood/lives and how living for the enemy or ourselves is useless works and in the end it burns. The yellow inside the fire represents souls lost in the lies of the enemy. And the grey on the outside of the fire represents confusion.