Fire-Flies

I've been feeling like there are so many people I know that are dying lately. I mean, I might not know them "know" them. I guess I should say, I know "of" them... Still, a lot of young amazing people are dying and it isn't RIGHT!

A few months ago, an amazing drummer died of cancer - Chase Lovelace was only 24 years old. I had met Chase a handful of times, he was such a happy, joyful spirit and MAN! did he play the drums wickedly. He played in a few of my favorite bands (that's how I knew him) Pillar, Stars Go Dim and Superchick.

In the beginning of last week Talia Joy Castellano died at the age of 13, from cancer. She had been fighting the good fight since she was seven! Instead of wearing wigs to cover her bald head (because of the chemo) she became a master of make-up and made tutorials on YouTube (how I found out about her) showing people how to do their make-up flawlessly.Make up was her wig.

This past weekend a Simmer (gamer) on YouTube died at the age of 25 years old. Quxxn, had had lung problems for many years. She went in for an operation, got an infection and then her body had enough and she died.

And let's not forget about Matthew Warren who was 27 years old when he took his own life a few months ago. He had been struggling with depression and suicide for years. 

This breaks my heart so much. The enemy is working over time, crushing out shinning stars before they get too bright. And it makes me so angry! How dare he do that! Taking out God's children, like it's nothing!

And then, I think about myself (cause I'm selfish like that), and how I have thoughts of suicide and how I make plans to take my own life. And that little God voice chimes in and is like: "Their life is important enough for you to get angry and upset about because it ended so short - but yours isn't?"

And I instantly feel convicted. Why is it others lives are important to me, but mine isn't? Why am I able to get angry, upset and pray for others that are getting messed with by the enemy, but I can't do that for myself? Why do I see others as shinning stars and I see myself as a black-hole? Why is it so easy for me to love others, but I can't love myself?

Yes -  I am angry. I am angry at the enemy for taking young lives too early and for messing with my mind. I'm angry at the enemy for not only killing people physically, but also emotinally and spiritually.

I'm angry at the enemy, and it's time I do something about it.